If you have been lucky enough to get any advice out of your mates on what to expect from fatherhood, it probably has been that “things will change”. Instead of going in with this vague idea of doom, here is more detail on the top five things that are going to change and how to deal with them.
1. You’ll get less attention from her
As your partner grapples with being a new mum her focus will be almost entirely elsewhere. Don’t wait to be asked what to do to help, get in there and find out what she wants your role to be.
2. You might get worried about money
Going from a comfortable double income down to perhaps only surviving on your pay is something you can plan for well in advance. Waiting until you are both tired to figure out a budget will probably result in a fight. Try to sit down and agree how your household budget is going to be run.
Do your research now into if you qualify for the Baby Bonus or Paid Parental Leave using the online estimator (click here) and submit your application in advance.
3. You will be sleep-deprived
Working together on looking after your baby in the night will help you both get some sleep and hopefully result in a happier household. Many fathers send mum to bed early and do a night feed with a bottle, say approx 10pm, before hitting the sack.
4. You might be worried you are not ready to be a dad
This is a pretty natural concern and it should cheer you up to know that the instinct will kick in, at some point. Allow yourself time to feel comfortable and confident in being a dad; don’t expect it all to happen at once.
5. You won’t be able to go out with your mates as much
Remind yourself that this is temporary. As you all settle into family life plenty of opportunities to go out with your mates will reappear. Then again, and you might not believe this, but you may not want to do the things you used to.